My name is Matt Morman, and I have been a parishioner of St. Clare and a parent of two St. Clare School students for 10 years. My sons, Miles and Max have received an excellent education here, and so have I. I attended many services here with my children as Altar servers before becoming Catholic, gradually persuading me to embrace my faith. I made the leap when Sr Kathy became the leader of Adult Religious Education, one of many moments I was touched by God, as I hold Sister in the highest regard.
My wife, and mother of my children, Megan, was raised Catholic in Toledo, Ohio with her sister Rachel, mother Sally, and Grandmother Viola. Megan and her sister attended Catholic Schools for 12-years as well as her mother. They graduated from the same high school as their mother also, Notre Dame Academy. Their grandmother’s sister was a Sister of Mary. There was no question that our children would be attending Catholic Schools. When we found St. Clare School, we found a community that continues to help our children grow, and also delivered me a peace I probably would not have found anywhere else. A parish that truly practices what is preached and embodies the Holy Spirit each week.
I was born to parents from different religious affiliations in the early 1970s, though both are Christian. My mother is Presbyterian, and my father was Catholic until his parents were divorced when he was 17. My grandmother was a faithful Catholic until her death, though her marriage to my grandfather was never annulled. My father felt she was not treated well by the Church, and left Catholic School in Toledo, Ohio his senior year of high school. He spent most of his childhood in the Church and served as an Altar boy, but his faith was shaken. As a result, my parents never raised me in a religious environment, though I was surrounded by many caretakers and interested neighbors that exposed me to many religions-Judaism, Greek Orthodox, Baptist, Lutheran and of course Catholicism.
I was baptized at 14 years old, when my mother’s mother was ill in the hospital, and concerned that I would be a heathen at the time of her death. She could not accept that she would not be able to have me in her after-life, so I was baptized as a Presbyterian, in Naples, FL. I never felt an intimacy with God continually like both my grandmothers had, but I respected them and their views, as they were my Elders, continually sharing their gifts of wisdom. I believe they are both with us today, this Mother’s Day, to be honored for their wisdom and guidance. You see, I have been touched by God many times in my life without recognizing it each time, but God sent me many mothers when my parents divorced shortly after my 7
th birthday. When one door closes, sometimes many doors open, especially when you open your mind.
On May 18, 2003 at Grosse Pointe Park, on a chilly Sunday sailboat race day, I really questioned the existence of God. I had my faith replaced with fear and regrets in a matter of minutes. As we were preparing our boat for a rough day on the water, big waves and big winds, another crew member came down the break wall, noticing a boat that was having some trouble, certainly unprepared for what was about to happen. A 10-year old boy was shrieking with a life jacket loosely attached around his neck, as our crew looked toward the 14-foot aluminum boat with 3 men and 2 boys, trying to fish. The boat starting taking on water, and the weight shifted aft in the boat. A man at the bow went back to bail the boat, and the boat rolled over, sending the passengers in the water. As a crew we worked to get the people out of the water in rough conditions. Two of us went over the sea wall, while the other two grabbed some lines so we could get back to the sea wall. We rescued 3 of the people, but the screaming 10-year old and a 24-year old man submerged and were not found for 2 days. This occurred less than 2 months before my first son Miles was born, also my nephew was turning 10 four days after that. I was sent into a tailspin months later, when I could begin processing what had just happened, what I had just witnessed, life, death, youth, innocence, terror, tragedy, divinity. All these different hands of God, were not only touching me, they were overwhelming me, knocking me off balance.
My family and I have been dealing with the waves that day brought to our shore. In my search to be able to understand the source of the rage I felt after I failed to save ALL the people on that fateful day, I needed understanding. My family suffered the waves and torrents that broke past my containment, and also my office assistant who would eventually become my sponsor to become Catholic. She would tell me from time to time that I needed to learn to forgive, that there was great power in forgiveness. What I didn’t realize, is that I thought it was just forgiveness of others that I needed, but I needed to forgive myself. I was always able to remain calm and steady in stressful situations, but now I was having difficulty seeing through the confusion and panic.
I started going to a counselor at my wife’s request, and to help show Lee I was trying to come to grips with my anger. The counselor that I was referred to, was named Angel, and she is. She was able to get me understand I was hurting the very people I love. I was blind, and she helped my see the gifts I had been given throughout my life, and that I was having a difficult time accepting the faults I have. She told me that the trauma that I witnessed was now a part of my life that I had to learn to deal with, because likely there was something in my past that was similar but was buried in order to move forward with my life at the time.
While going through this self-examination, our time was spent raising our two great boys along with the help and guidance of Sr. Kathy Avery, the Principal of St. Clare of Montefalco School. She along with many amazing teachers helped to share the love of learning, the love of life, and the love of God. I was attending church occasionally, but usually just for school related functions and the boys’ Altar serving days. As I once told Sr. Kathy, “my church is on the water” I am a sailor by family, and had always found my peace sailing, doing my best with the wind and weather God gave me. I wasn’t sailing as much though because I had a new family to adjust to, and I felt distant from that spiritual connection the wind and water gave me.
My family are sailors of pleasure sailboats and racing sailboats and have been in the boat business for three generations. My career at the time was building carbon fiber masts for racing sailboats that have been raced all over the world. I myself had the wonderful experiences of sailing in South Africa, France, along the East Coast, as well as to Hawaii. The experience that I had buried, however was becoming apparent as I listened to the Homily about Peter visited by Jesus while in a storm on his boat. I needed to take a leap of faith to walk on the water with Jesus. A true epiphany occurred, my grandfather drowned in Lake Erie when I was also 7-years old! The tragic loss of one of my earliest heroes had the emotional connection my counselor Angel had suggested was making my anger rise so quickly in stressful situations. My foundation was shaken.
When Sr. Kathy retired as the Principal of St. Clare School, I found out she was in charge of the RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults), I was starting to see the Light. I asked our office manager, Lee to sponsor me, and she agreed. I was again realizing how lucky I was to have so many people that were around me through that dark time, always shining a light in my direction, but suddenly started to come into focus. The great families I had worked with at St. Clare, showed me the meaning of the Holy Spirit whenever I saw them. This wonderful Parish was blessed with God’s delivery of Father Andrew whose love and enthusiasm, breathe life into the Scriptures that bring me more clarity each Mass.
Thank you, St. Clare Parish and all the volunteers that have made this a great center of hope for so many in the community, and the many more yet to come. Thank you to my mothers, Mary who could not be here today, and Debbie; I would like to thank my wife, and mother of my children, Megan. My sponsor Lee, a great mother in her own right, showed me the power of Mary, and without us recognizing her love and faith, we miss the strength and fortitude of women in all our lives.